Hopefully if you know me at all or have followed my blog, you know that I am madly in love with my husband, Rob. We are coming up on our four year wedding anniversary and the honeymoon is still going!
Rob works hard to keep our love alive, our house peaceful, and he continues to surprise me. Recent geology work revealed that Rob is half French and not as Italian as previously believed. This revelation came right around the time I started writing regularly. I joked that we are a good match because he is French and I am a poet.
Rob makes the perfect grilled cheese sandwich, and yes they are better than usual. He is sensitive to my feelings and can make me laugh. There is no one else I would rather spend my day with, face a problem with, or go on a new advantage with than my hubby. Rob leads our family with his strong faith, is steady and sweet, funny and deliberate, smart and goofy, and is clean. Yes, my husband picks up after himself, cooks, and cleans. I know you all thought I was gushing but now you believe me. My husband is my greatest gift from God.
I am not blind. Rob is not perfect. It's just that the good far out ways any imperfection and his love is active and pure.
What touches my heart in a powerful way is that Rob is not afraid to put time and effort into an area that is outside of his nature to make me happy. When I met Rob he was not crazy about sushi and never rode his bike. Regardless, he took me to sushi restaurants and rode bikes with me at the park because of my preferences. He now loves sushi just as much as I do.
Once again Rob has surprised and delighted me by writing me poetry!!! At first I thought he was joking. Again, I am aware of his strengths and weakness.
I am honored that Rob has spent precious time outside of his comfort zone to take care of my emotional needs without an ask or even an expectation from me. Rob simply knew this expression of love would touch my heart in a new way so he invested his energy to do so. I may be a little biased but he actually has a knack for poetry.
What's equally amazing is that God healed my attachment issues so that I can participate and enjoy this amazing love. What a tragedy it would have been to stay in my prison of self-isolation! God delivered me from internal walls of excessive self-protection and is now my eternal protector and gave me an earthly covering through my husband.
In my book, Canyons & Fireworks, I write about God introducing me to my unborn sister when I was eight years old. It was the 90s and my mother was told she was having a boy but God revealed the truth to me. I saw that my sister would have big blue expressive eyes, long legs, and a unique personality. I also heard future conversations we would have together and saw her God given identity. Everything the Lord showed me came true!
God repeated this technique in regard to my relationship with Rob. God told me Rob was my husband five months before Rob knew. During those five months God allowed me to see Rob through His eyes. It is one thing to fall in love with someone you are attracted to or have a natural connection with but when God creates a bond, the union is out of this world!
At eighty years old I was suffering from an extreme avoid attachment style or disorder, because of the trauma of extreme separation that I experienced. I struggles to feel or receive love, trust others, and I feared intimacy. The sisterhood, God created between my sister and I was the beginning of my healing.
Although I walked through a lot of healing by the time I met Rob, God wanted to solidy the most important relationship of my earthly life. During those five months it was like God was carrying our marriage in His womb until the appropriate birthing time.
Today I can boldly proclaim this relationship was worth the wait! God's healing and timing is perfect. I had to walk through my healing just to be able to receive love and God wanted to forge an unshakable bond so that His glory can be seen in our marriage.
God loves to be the center of our very lives, and that does not end at marriage. He loves marriage and wants to build healthy connection so that marriages can last a lifetime and honor Him.
When I was single the main message was, "Do not settle." While this is important, often the concept of working on your own individual inner healing is overshadowed. Hurts from the past can intrude on loving connections of the here and now.
Do any hurts from the past show up in your current relationship? How might you find healing with the Lord?
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